Kae vs Whistling

I pretty much only whistle one song. That's it. That's all. It's weird, this I know. I was at Kae's when all of a sudden the only song I whistle was being whistled from the other room. Shocked was I. What other crazy person whistles the Sesame Street theme song in their day to day happenings? Apparently she. This made me laugh greatly. Come on, it's funny. I told her. She lost all whistling abilities. She would try and I would laugh. It was bad. Even now when she tries, I laugh, and nothing happens. Still. Nothing. She keeps telling me she can whistle. I believe her. I've heard her. Apparently though, once Sesame Street caught, the whistle goes out the window. Whahaha. Now all whistling makes me laugh. Impressive hilarity skills, Kae. Impressive...

Nieceamine vs The Same Lemon

I have told the 'Pink Lemon' story many times. I love it. It's in this blog so I won't retell it, but know that it makes me laugh. I told it to my family. Funny things. Anyways, Nieceamine didn't get it. She believed in pink lemons as well. I get that. The desire to believe in possibilities. There is an ornamental pink lemon in existence, but it's far more sour and not normally used to make drinkable juice. Either way, pink lemonade has pink added to it, sometimes just colouring and extra sugar, but mostly the delicious flavourings of Strawberry, Raspberry, or Cherry are used in a combo move. A symbiotic relationship of flavour. For the benefit of everyone who loves it.

Cashier Tales: Pet Peeves

May 13th, 2011 11:49 AM

People that lick their money before giving it to you (especially if they're looking at you - weird). People that put their full baskets on the cash - I'm short enough already and pulling heavy stuff out of it is just awkward. People that stack their items in piles on top of each other - they're going to topple on me. Avid belt button pushers - your stuff is going to get smushed. Touchy people - I don't know you - don't grab my hand when I give you change! People that put items they don't want on the ground - I don't care what you leave just stop making such a mess - and don't do that with cold stuff! You're ripping the store off or you're getting someone sick! All of this stuff makes me laugh when not working, but today it's too much. People are not taking any responsibility for themselves. They want what they want when they want it. I get that being a customer is frustrating sometimes, that you have to wait in a line and spend your hard earned money. It's sucky, but step up. I complain, I complain - but I had some great customers today. My favorite really old guy who does the best sound effects ever, one really loud guy who was hilarious, some really nice ladies, cute babies, a lady who's a burger eater who wrote my name down because I told her I'd try the ones on sale, and a glad man who has this signature move which I call 'The Startle' - it's the best thing ever! Oh, this world of ups and downs. It's really in the moments. In how we respond to everyone. Are you going to be a grump or a light-giver? Either way - make your decision and don't be fake about it. I hate fake. Rant over. Attitude over. Break over. Back to scaring people with my tone-deaf singing skills.

Origin of Nicknames: Spew

I don't know how she let me call her Spew. I seriously don't. It's been like 11 years. I think she must have just known that it was always said with much love. Today is Spew's birthday and so I write this for her, never expecting her to read it, but knowing that she knows it. Spew is a lifer. She's a never put you down, always for you, always the real her, always faithful, and always awesome person. She's everything you could want in a friend. I'm an odd duck, I'll say it always, but I'm odd in my friendships too. I'm a lifer as well. I don't talk to Spew often anymore, we just kind of drifted apart, life made its way in through us growing up. I'm still for her though. Completely. And I still feel like she knows who I am and that I know who she is. I get that people continually grow and change in the course of their lives, but I think there's a core that remains the same. That a spark of person genuineness is the same throughout the years. I would be there if she needed me, I have been there when she needed me, and I know that the same is true for her. I'm both a non-stop talker and a non-talker, but I know that I've gotten this across: I'm a sticker. Through all  of my annoying actions, through the many quirks I have, through awkwardness, and through troubles, I'm for people. I met Spew through TH. It was Grade 8. All I remember was that she was one of the nicest people I'd ever met. She was so steady at an age where such a thing was a rarity. For many, steadiness is still a rarity. She had a good sense of humour too. I was bugging her at Ski Club or at lunch one day. She was eating Poutine. I made her laugh. She spewed fries out of her mouth. Looking back I would have probably called her 'Poutine' - 'Tiney' for short (she is). Ah well, Spew stuck, in name and in friendship. Happy Birthday Spew!

SKI ISSUES: Some Really Bad Advice (from ME)

SO, Me and TH were skiing with a big group of people. We didn't know each other well. At all really. Anyways, we were going down a hill. I'd bombed it until I got to a fork in the path. TH came up and asked which way to go. I said 'I think to the right'. Right she went. I waited. Then, the rest of the group bombed past me to the left. Too much time had passed and I didn't think I could catch up to her. So, I, horrible person that I am, went left. I tried to meet up with her at the bottom of the hill. That's when I learned that to the right was a black diamond hill. She was a new skier. I spent the next hour looking for her. It was bad. Finally, after talking to what felt like everyone I'd ever met, I checked the lodge. She was fine. Probably a little upset, but still safe. Now, that's a funny way to make a friend.

Radio SCANNERS: Me, TH, and the STRANGER

Hitting the scan button on the radio is probably one of my most favourite car pastimes. I love it. Sure, you hit some corn, some junk, some talking, and lots of advertisements. Still, there's something about having 30 seconds of possibilities. Me and TH were being awesome in the Highlander. We scanned until we hit what Mister Giggles calls 'The Mothermode'. POLKA! It was epic. We decided to go full out. Windows wide open, we blasted it! We car danced! We drove past this old lady carrying her groceries home. She started dancing! It was awesome. Like twenty minutes later we passed her again. She saw us and started waving like a crazy person... like the way I wave... like the way TH waves when she's not being self-conscious. All for the love of polka. I could never find that station again. It may have been a theme hour or something, either way, it was amazing. Fun times.

Me Accidently Singing.

I am tone-deaf. I sing horribly. That admitted, I love music. I sing all day long, very badly, but still I sing. I sing at work all of the time. I scare people with it. I do so intentionally. One time however, it was quite by accident. I was a Disney kid. 'The Beauty and The Beast' was and is and will always be one of my favourite movies. When I was 13, I finally tracked down the soundtrack (Remember with before iTunes and Amazon... weird). Anyways my parents, TH, and me were heading up to the cottage. I was enjoying the CD on my awesome Discman! Anyways, like half an hour later TH smacked me. When I pulled off my headphones she asked me to please stop singing. I had no idea. I still feel bad that they had to listen to that for half an hour! Hahaha! Obviously not super bad...